Warning: Satirical micro story
Hillary Clinton decides to try driving again as her advisers tell her it will make her seem closer to those common folks she needs, and promptly runs over a six year old school girl, a refugee from Honduras, walking home, on the sidewalk. The media arrive, oddly enough, at the same time as a crowd of Clinton staffers and Bill Clinton, but Bill is off to one side, alone, staring at the girl on the ground, trying to suppress curiosity as to what she’ll look like when she turns eighteen. The Clinton staffers surreptitiously hand several member of the press corps a photocopied sheet on which a story has been written with several blanks to fill in a name.
Next day the headlines read,
“Attempted assassination of presidential candidate by young illegal immigrant suicide crasher probably orchestrated by Julian Assange, at the urging of Russian leader Vladimir Putin. Limousine only slightly damaged. Immediate deportation hearings held.”
A follow up story appears the day after about Donald Trump’s poor driving record as a teenager.